This Is How We Do It: Asparagus
Chinese Backstreet Boys lip-sync band, how do I love thee?
Let me count the ways:
-The Backstreet Boys released “That Way” in 1998. The lip-sync di tutti lip-syncs above was recorded by three students calling themselves “Chinese Backstreet Boys” in 2005. The Backstreet Boys were conceived with a shelf life of about a minute and a half in mind; however, seven full years later, the song still resonated to the point of inspiring this lovefest. Now it’s 2011 and this song still has mindshare with me, thanks to these three superfans and the following magical moments: …Read the rest of this article »
This Is How We Do It: Shrimp
Nuttin' But Love
RIP Heavy D, who gave us two timeless hits (this one and this one), a lesser hit I like even more than the other two, and one great album title/nickname-of-a-nickname (“Waterbed Hev”). As far as I know, he coined the word “conversate.” He also left us with this, a line I’ve never forgotten.
I’d like to see a remake of “Return of the Jedi” where at the end, a redeemed Heavy D goes to Jedi heaven, where fellow portly-to-obese rappers Big Pun, Notorious B.I.G., and Buffy the Human Beat Box await. But until that day comes, I console myself with this great technique for shrimp with a shockingly low amount of muss and/or fuss.
This is How We Do It: Salmon
Dear New York City cyclists,
Stop riding the wrong way on the bike lanes.
This should be obvious. We’ve been thrown a huge bone by the Bloomberg administration, whose bike-friendly policies …Read the rest of this article »
This is How We Do It: Eggplant
NOTE: It’s come up several times in these pages that when it comes to cooking, technique is the thing. Being able to follow a recipe is a skill in and of itself and a very important one; however, at a certain point that method stops teaching you much. To go further, …Read the rest of this article »
Making the Brand
Insert OJ caption here
I promised some vegetarian material.
And it’s coming. Believe, me, it is.
It’s just that I have a bull’s horn in my pocket, bull blood on my gloves, bull poo on my pants, and a bull’s testicle in my pocket right now. So I’m having a hard time thinking about tofu. …Read the rest of this article »
We Got Beef
I must break you
What is the most delicious animal?
For as long as I can remember, the answer to this question was a no-brainer. Ever since my mom started making the best spaghetti carbonara ever when I was about five years old, the pig – He Who is Made of Bacon – was number one with a bullet. Over the thirty-plus years since, the world has seen extraordinary changes, but one thing has remained constant: the swine in pole position.
Until now.
A Year in Steer
The Portable Chef and friends bought an entire grass-fed steer and are cataloguing it, bite by bite.
5/14/11
27. Uri, filet mignon, homemade crouton, wilted spinach with lime, hulled barley with adzuki beans
3/22/11
26. Maamoun, Top sirloin steak
3/22/11.
25. Tanvi, New York strip steak with sauteed spinach
3/22/11
24. Tanvi, beef and mushroom lasagna (ground beef)
3/15/11
23. Jeremy, T-bone steak pan-roasted with butter and herbs
3/12/11
22. Tanvi, Spaghetti Bolognese (ground beef)
3/8/11
21. Maamoun, steak sandwich (sandwich steak)
3/7/11
20. Tara, goulash (stew meat), with spaetzle with brown butter and roasted carrots and a bottle of Anton Paul Zweigelt, Blaufrankisch, and Merlot blend
3/5/11
19. Jeremy, cheeseburger (ground beef) with the works
3/4/11
18. Uri, sauteed beef with coconut milk (sandwich steak)
3/3/11
17. Jeremy, meat loaf (ground beef)
2/11/11
16. Uri, salad with ground beef, baby greens, almonds, cranberries, and blood orange vinaigrette
2/9/11
16. Jesse, burger
2/8/11
14. Uri, Ground beef with penang curry and cranberries, shredded broccoli and carrots
2/4/11
13. Uri, chuck steak braised in ale with mushrooms, onions, and bacon
2/3/11
12. Jesse and Liz, top sirloin, pan-seared and roasted, squash, broccoli
2/2/11
11. Maamoun and Andy, pan-seared ribeye steak with mashed potatoes
1/31/11
10. Jonathan and Carleen, homemade pasta Bolognese (ground beef)
1/28/11
9. Uri, salad of baby greens with ground beef, almonds, and truffle salt
1/27/11
8. Andy and Maamoun, Beef Bourguignon (chuck steak), baby lettuce salad
1/25/11
7. Lasagne al forno con sugo di Eduardo Pazzo
1/24/11
6. New York strip steak
1/23/11
5. Mongolian beef with cabbage and peppers (ground beef)
1/22/11
4. Ground beef. Fusilli with meat sauce
1/21/11
Lots of ground beef in the early going. But we do have a ways to go.
3. Meatballs from the Frankie Spuntino Cookbook (ground beef)
1/20/11
2. Cincinnati Chili (ground beef)
1/19/11
After completing the 2010 Beef Draft, the first thing I made was a burger.
I started thinking about the enormity of our purchase relative to the size of my burger, which was providing an entirely filling and memorable meal. If my quarter-poundish burger was an average serving size, and we had 550 pounds of beef (the 600 lbs. shipping weight minus some for bones and packaging), then there were 2,200 individual meals to be had from our one steer – in hundreds of separate preparations.
And I thought, wouldn’t it be great to record those meals?
Fortunately, these thoughts occurred to me just seconds before what would have been a concept-killing last bite:
1. Burger. Ground beef, Food for Life sprouted grain muffin, special sauce
My draftmates are game. This blog post will be continually updated with new photos of meals from Crazy Eddie beef.
The Lazy Sybarite: Make Cheese Without Leaving the House
What Would Dionysus‘ Caterer Do?
Well, if he were smart, he’d bone up on cheese, cured meats, and wine, staples in any serious attempt at decadence. …Read the rest of this article »
Bologna Helped Me See the Error of My Ways
I’d always thought of David Sedaris as, well, not that funny. That’s all changed.
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